Wet April Fools

Apr 1, 2009 at 3:29 PM
OK. My house decided to play an April Fool's day joke on me.

In the middle of the night, my water quit completely. Not a drop.

I totally blamed Libs and Sean for their high water usage. But then when the ranch foreman got it working again, I found out it was dirt in the line, clogging it up.

So I apologized to Libs and Sean.

Then the toilet wouldn't work at all. Then when I tried to fix the toilet, while unscrewing the water hose, a water pipe burst in the bathroom wall. Water started flooding in like a horror movie. Like 1408 when he drowns, only maybe only my head. It sounded like the wall was dealing with AMAZINGly good water pressure, even though I have crappy water pressure in almost every tap normally. Pish.

Then I couldn't find the water shutoff. Turns out it's under the side porch. Didn't know that until WAY too late.

Then I screamed Help about twenty times and discovered that if I'm ever ACTUALLY in mortal danger and scream help, no one's coming. Not even Libby from the next room, who wouldn't notice if a train ran into the house when she's sleeping/busy/resting/listening to music.

Crap.

Then I'm running around the house picking things up off an increasingly wet floor, while trying to call the ranch foreman with the phone on my shoulder.

Then I'm cleaning up ridiculous amounts of water from every floor in the house and cussing.

Then Frank starts repairing the toilet. And the fumes from the PVC pipe joint sealer totally start messing with my head.

Then I check the toilet when he's done and he'd removed an ancient clog. That toilet never refilled well, SLOW, sluggish flushing.

Well now it's got GREAT water pressure. breaking the pipe cleared some ancient clog and now I can go number one AND number two without fear of flushability.

We're all totally jazzed right now. Whether any of that is sealer-induced euphoria, I don't know. But the toilet working well for the first time ever is flipping awesome.

2 comments

  1. Mr.Pete. Says:

    Looks like bad and good news. Always an adventure. I'm jazzed for you.

  2. Kat Says:

    Desi.

    I don't know what else to say. A post about a water pipe bursting which ends with the words "flipping awesome."

    I understand. We have one sluggish toilet in which pooping is precarious. Luckily we have two toilets!

    Oh, Desi. You're so Desi. I miss you.