Demands of the great wheel

Oct 21, 2008 at 4:07 PM
I am about to turn 32 and I just found a truly silver hair growing out of my head. Right out of it, plain as day. Straight up from the top.

My youth is OVER.

I never did drugs, no matter who was trying to get me to. I never wore bikinis even when I had my bikini body. I never tried to steal someone else's sweetheart. I have helped people in their endeavors as often as possible - rarely leaving someone behind unless they'd failed me at least three times. I never took any of those solicitous men up on their varied offers. I have had a very boring, helpful, purpose-driven life doing pretty much nothing but raising kids - mine and other people's.

I am a good person. So why is this happening?

Karmically, I'm due. I'm past due. If, on top of everything else, I have to have a silver hair now, A REAL silver hair, I want something in exchange. I want a man. That man that I deserve. Whoever the hell he is and where ever he's been hiding, it's TIME.

GIVE, life, give it here. Or else.



DAD: Reminds me of the good old days when I had hair on top of my head.
DESI: Puts things in perspective.


Oh great wheel:

In retrospect, thank you for continuing to grant me my abundant waves of coppery-brown-and-now-silver dead protein strands. If they all turn silver or even white, at least I have them. Perhaps you would consider sending the hypothetical good man in exchange for the hypothetical years of future charity and volunteer work I will be able to do if supported by said good man? I do understand that it doesn't work in foresight - but I sure would like one anyway.


  1. lupingirl Says:

    I started going grey at 16 - and I still had the boring youth!

  2. Kat Says:

    I am over 4 years older than you, and I have no grey hairs. But I did drugs, wore bikinis, once tried (and failed) to steal someone else's sweetheart, and took numerous solicitous men up on their varied offers. Maybe there's something to that.


  3. desi Says:

    Kat that is so not fair.

    And to Shelley I would like to say thanks for the inspiration. It was Shelley's story that made me think of the great wheel today.

  4. desi Says:

    Thank you oh great wheel for pointing out the obvious to both of us.

  5. desi Says:

    I've gottens ome odd responses to this one by email. I may make all my demands on the great wheel through that hotline of yours in the future, Shells.