Sep 3, 2006 at 5:37 PM
Sorry so long without blogging.

I have not been feeling good about my body for a bit now. I remember the exact moment last week when I decided to start doing something about it. I felt poorly, exhausted a lot, and I was out doing my food shopping. I looked at the magazine in the rack beside my line. It had a picture of Nicole Ritchie, whom I couldn't really care less about, and her eating disorder woes. Beside it was her weight, and they were worried about her at 82 pounds. She weighed exactly half what I did that day. HALF. It follows that if a woman could weigh half what I do and be at the extreme end of thin, I must conversely be at the extreme end of chubby. Even taking height into account, the difference was too extreme to mean I am at an okay weight. No longer merely "a little padded" I suddenly realized that I tottering my way closer every day toward the fate of looking like the "before" picture that is inevitably on the back page of every fashion magazine.

I took half the contents of my cart and put them back on the shelves. No chips, no pudding, no milk.

I don't want to be chubby. I love the outdoors, I love exercise, and I love being graceful. You can't be graceful as easily when you're overweight.

That was last week. I took a good look in the mirror and realized that I couldn't see the lines of my muscles as easily anymore. Mostly just long, flat, smooth planes of roundedness. I like feeling FIT, and hadn't realized (no mirrors in my house) how far south I'd gone from what I thought I was like. I got morose about it, and then quickly transitioned to being a woman on a mission. I've lost 9 pounds already from eating very well (never forgetting a meal time or ignoring hunger), cutting out all sugar of any kind, all dairy (which I am allergic to anyway) and non-vegetable carbs, and from strengthening my daily exercise to thrice daily (ten or 15 minutes at a time max).

I feel very good, too. The biggest side effect of eating well, better than losing weight, is the raised energy levels. Yum. And my mood swings disappear.

Hopefully, within a few months, I can look more like the me I want to be. I'll keep you posted. I certainly don't plan to obsess about food or start trying to learn how to throw up, but I do intend to get back to where I feel healthiest and most attractive, which is around 130 pounds.

Sorry to bore you with my weight issues, but that's the post. I've been focusing on DOING things lately, so I forgot all about you, my audience of good friends.

1 Responses to Update

  1. Mikey Says:

    Good for you Desi. Our family has been on a bit of a healtha kick for the last two years. We have taking up the foods we eat as the first order of business. We slowly switched over to all organic foods. However the eating out or ordering out still happens once or twice a week. Excercise is a real trick but we have the kids enrolled in gym and dance and I know they get plenty of playtime at school. The most important thing that we have done to improve our health has been to go see Dr. Susan Player. I remember her from many years ago because you knew her. I didn't realize our deep the connection ran until I had mentioned you to her. Anyway she is wonderful. I have handled high and irratic blood pressure as well as some heavy metals like aluminum and mercury. Her methods are unreal but the results are undeniable.

    That reminds me, with your weight loss you need to be mindful of detoxing some nasty stuff, especially ciggarette stuff. It is no fun at all.